A recent story the Democrat-Herald has followed — one that’s sad, scary, tragic, senseless and gruesome all at the same time — involves a young man who was jumped and beaten nearly to death by a mob also made up of young people.
If you click on the link and read the story, you’ll notice the victim’s mother thinks the incident arose from jealousy over her son’s girlfriend.
“I’m so angry this happened over as something as stupid as a girl,” the article quotes the mother as saying.
I saw the story and the quote at about 4 p.m. Friday and immediately read the quote aloud to city editor Karen Petersen.
“As stupid as a girl,” I said, expecting, I suppose, for her to join me in thinking that the phrase sounded quite demeaning to the female gender.
“That’s how (online editor) Graham (Kislingbury) read that quote too, but I wasn’t offended by it at all,” Karen said.
“Girls are stupid?” photographer David Patton said. “I didn’t know girls were stupid.”
And thus ensued a lively discussion and analysis, newsroom-wide, regarding the mother’s choice of words.
It was basically a 50-50 split, with the men more apt than the women to take offense at the comment.
Karen’s basic point was that jealousy was a poor reason for people to fight.
“First off, regardless of what was behind it, this wasn’t a fight — this was an attack,” I said.
“Crime of passion. People shoot each other over relationships,” said Patton, noting that this sort of thing is at least a common reason, if not necessarily a good one, for violence.
“To me,” I said, “in addition to coming across as a put-down for girls, what the mother said implies that there could be a smart motivation that would justify that kind of attack. ‘… as stupid as a girl, not something important like a spot on the football team.’”
What do you think? I know the mother is very upset and this is not intended as a criticism of her grasp of language nuance, but do you see any problem with how she expressed herself?

12 comments
Tara says:
Feb 10, 2012
Being a girl myself no I don’t see any problem with how she expressed herself. I am sure she didn’t mean the girl was stupid but that the reason her son could have got attacked was because of a girl was stupid. Meaning that it was ridiculous to attack her son over a girl. Many people have got in fights because of relationships and in the end most of the time it isn’t worth it. Why is everyone so concerned about what one mother said? Her son was attacked and nearly beaten to death. I am pretty sure we should be worrying about other more important things than something that was said by someone who is clearly very upset that all of this has happened to her son!
laurie says:
Feb 11, 2012
I’m not sure what I have to say would be appropriate hereditary. Suffice it to say that if a man were to take a beating for me, I would be honored beyond words.
laurie says:
Feb 11, 2012
Hereditary? Meant to say “here”. Stupid smartphone.
Trish says:
Feb 11, 2012
Seriously? Someone in her situation shouldn’t have to worry about how she words her disgust at the senseless beating of her child. As a mother myself, I know that as she is trying to find the words to describe her feelings she has a mental image of her son getting kicked repeatedly in the head as a backdrop. That’s a pretty distracting thought to put it mildly. Can we all take a moment to appreciate what that must feel like? It’s a helpless enough feeling just to watch your child with the flu knowing that you can’t take away their pain and she is watching her son laying in a hospital bed almost unrecognizable, suffering because of something ridiculous! My point is that we could all have a little sympathy, empathy, understanding… whatever you want to call it and accept her intent rather than hang on the possible meaning of a couple misplaced words. Mr. Lundberg – worry about your own lack of sensitivity and focus your efforts elsewhere!
Zentz says:
Feb 11, 2012
I actually noticed this as well. And strangely enough, the same questions went through my mind. What reason, pray tell, is a “smart” reason?
The family and friends of the “stupid girl” are even more offended and disgusted with this womans choice of words. Find out why over the next few months, as the story unfolds.
If the justice system worked, we wouldn’t have this type of thing going on. Is it right to take the law into your own hands and decide the proper course of punishment? No. Breaking the law is never right. We have laws in place for a reason.
The detectives, police and justice system are just as much at fault for this as are the young people who decided to take the law into their own hands. The “stupid” girl and the young men should have been able to trust the laws, and the punishments for said laws, in the first place.
Mike Broberg says:
Feb 11, 2012
If you pull out “as stupid as a girl” like you did for the blog heading, it has the the desired effect…what the heck is that about?
If you read the whole quote it makes perfect sense but it should have been phased differantly. ie “It was stupid for him to get beaten up over a a girl” The mom probably was not analyzing her words from a journalist point of veiw when she said what she said.
You could insert alot of other nouns in place of “girl” and the beating is equally stupid .
If he had been beaten because …he was a fan of the “wrong team” or the thugs wanted his new Air Jordans, or because of the color of his skin, none of these things makes it okay.
Sticking up for her honor in a fair fight and losing, like in the movies, while romantic, is not the same as being beaten to a pulp by a gang of thugs. There is no motive that makes a sensless beating not stupid.
It would be a differant story entirely if for instance he had taken addvange of her and her brothers got a group of friends to teach him a lesson…but that is not what happend is it.
Zentz says:
Feb 11, 2012
“It would be a differant story entirely if for instance he had taken addvange of her and her brothers got a group of friends to teach him a lesson…but that is not what happend is it.”
Tell me how you know this isn’t exactly what happened? Please, don’t spout off nonsense. You have absolutely no clue, whatsoever, what you are talking about. You should be, and will be ashamed of yourself in time.
Mike Broberg says:
Feb 13, 2012
It was not meant to be a statment of fact Mr. Zentz (oh wait I shouldn’t assume your gender) It was intended to call into question that the story given did not give any insight into other possible motives and to suggest that perhaps they have it all wrong with the “jelousy over a girl” angle. I guess I should have used a question mark? Also, you will notice that I don’t hide behind anonymity, I am ashamed of nothing. My posts are always accompanied my full name.
You, sir (opps did it again) should look in the mirror and take some of your own medicine.
Zentz says:
Feb 13, 2012
The story isn’t giving any insight into other possible motives because it is illegal for the Democrat Herald to “suggest” possible motives in a public newspaper.
Any respectable adult would understand that and not jump to negative conclusions. There is a hysterical bandwagon going round and way too many people are jumping on it.
Some of the female members of my family are receiving threatening phone calls and even being followed (in a car) by an “unknown” male.
Would it make you feel better if I put my full name on here, possibly risking my safety, just because some man named Mike Broberg is proud to be putting his name on a blog and his posts are always accompanied by his name?
I think that’s a fantastic idea.
In the same paragraph, you call these boys a gang of thugs, saying there is no motive for this type of beating and then proceed to say they would be “teaching him a lesson” if they had reason for doing this.
And yes…adding a question mark to your “statement” would have made it in fact, a question and not a statement.
Steve Lundeberg says:
Feb 13, 2012
Just to clarify:
The DH is not a “public” newspaper. We are a private-sector business owned by Lee Enterprises, which is a publicly traded corporation however.
It wouldn’t be illegal for us to suggest motives — First Amendment — just irresponsible. We try not to deal in suggestions, but rather in facts in evidence. Of course, if our suggestions libel anyone, we could find ourselves in civil court.
Lastly, as a general rule I do like commenters to use their names. Not casting any stones in this case, but I think too many people online have digital courage, the kind fueled by anonymity, that they couldn’t muster in real life.
Tracy says:
Feb 13, 2012
I agree with Mr. Lundeberg. As a mother of three daughters, when I read the story that sentence jumped right out at me. How did the gender of the person, that the dispute/ attack was about, somehow invalidate the reason? And I do believe it says something about her conceptualization of gender and individual worth; especially since she was upset. The bottom line is people physically attacking one another is never (no matter the reason) a good idea…
Combustible comparison | Steve Lundeberg says:
Apr 6, 2012
[...] whole thing kind of reminds of something I wrote about a couple months ago. I still think “as stupid as a girl” is a really poor [...]